Open Letter

To the creep down the hall who screams at his dog all the day long:

I know you, man. I see you around. That dog is your only freaking friend. Now, knowing you as I do, I am not saying that your total lack of human friends is a shocker. I am saying that you should be thankful for that dog, because he is likely the only thing alive to put up with you, and possibly the only thing standing between you and dying alone, as you likely have thoroughly earned.

As for me, I hope he bites your cranky, failed-anger-management ass off. Believe me, you'll deserve it, and I will personally testify for self defense on the dog's behalf, you ungrateful bastard.

Sincerely,

Chick down the hall (with a face, too, not just knockers).

Who doesn't enjoy an Open Letter?

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PS: Have I been spoofed?
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